Recollections
by Nix-the-Neko
Summary: A lone man lost within the Dark Realm finds a mysterious companion and decides to share his story. A trip into the memories of a once forgotten sage.
1. Prologus: Beatae Memoriae

_(A.N. Welcome my friends, to the beginning of a hopefully long and wonderful journey. After discussing this with a friend of mine, we began to brainstorm ideas for this. There will be tragedy. It will be almost every genre except western and maybe romance. I may even put that in. There may be OCs, but they will be but tools to write this. I hope that you have as much fun reading this as I will as I write this.)_

_Prologus: Beatae Memoriae_

A single man stood in his own lonely world. He was surrounded by darkness on all sides, the only bit of reprieving light filtered from his own chest. However, even that which was once radiant was beginning to waver. It would flicker and dim until the man struggled to remember why he was in this place again.

This place was his prison, a prison not of his own choosing but it would have been had he been giving a choice in the matter. This place, this purgatory, was a fitting place for him and reminded him of the chains that bound his heart and very soul to the choking blackness. The chain of memories, his chain of memories would sometimes seem almost false to him. It was if the time in the world of absolute darkness had changed him.

Time… such a man-made concept had no place in this hell. Even if there was a time of day, of desired light, to counteract this ever present nightfall it would still not matter. The man had discovered early on that when you are absolutely and truly alone time does not exist.

This was not the man's first time in this purgatory, this place of limbo where one does not age yet still forgets. The man's memory was fading once again, yet he held on tightly to them, desperate to remember who he was and why he was the person that he was.

He did not pity himself, oh no, he had abandoned all his feelings of self-pity long ago. It was hopelessness that dimmed the light that was once radiant. But once he remembered hope, only then would the light of his heart shine brightly once more and light his path.

And so the man began to walk, lost in a broken memory of a time which he barely recalled. A time that would never again be possible, traveling to a past through the only true way that existed, a way that could become corrupted and twisted into something almost unrecognizable.

Memory.

Soon his wanderings took him to a familiar location, one that he had spent much time around. It was the place where he had giving himself a new name to reflect how he had changed. He walked over and stood before the weak waves before sitting on a rock, gazing out onto the false light that was seemingly trapped between large stone arches and reflected off the dark ocean. The man once against lost himself in his own scattered recollections.

He was not aware of how much time passed as he sat. He also did not notice a person, another soul that had been lost to this place long before he had been, walk over to him. She stood there, silent, for only a second before she spoke.

"Who are you?"

"Hmm," The man said and turned his head to look at the new arrival in slight surprise. "Why hello, it's not often I get visitors."

"Please, call me Aqua." The girl said, sounding both sad and weary. There was however, as the man noticed, a look of hope that still burned in her eyes. "Why are you sitting here all alone in the Realm of Darkness? How did you end up here?"

"Well," the man started to explain, his voice low and slightly raspy from disuse. He looked back out onto the ocean and continued to speak. "I can tell you this is my second time on these shores, but unfortunately much like the first, I do not remember who I am or whence I came. Everything was washed away in whatever currents carried me here."

"That's too bad." Aqua said as she looked down. She turned to face the ocean and sat down. "I know I've been here a long time, wandering through the endless hours, unable to escape."

The man glanced at her and asked a question to which he already knew the answer to. "You wish to return your own world?"

Aqua did not look up and only nodded slowly before she spoke again. "It's my friends. I promised I'd be there for them."

"Your friends…?" the man said slowly as he looked up at the empty sky and for the first time in a great amount of time he remembered. "Somewhere in a scrap of memory I have left you remind me of a boy I once knew. He is very much like you." He could tell that she carried the same sort of light as that boy.

That boy was his hope, the force the replenished his weary heart and allowed it to light his path once more. Her mere presence was glowing with light and the man felt more of his memories returning.

"True to his friends and kind, he travels to many worlds and fights to keep the light safe." The man continued speaking.

"Keep the light safe?" Aqua said and looked up at him, confusion evident in her tone yet her face was emotionless save her eyes. The man concluded that she must have forgotten how to show emotion.

"I've been away too long. Did something happen out there? Are the worlds in danger?" Aqua asked as she continued to speak, concern edging its way into her voice now.

"Sad to say, they nearly fell to darkness more than once. But every turn that boy arrived, keyblade in hand, to save the day." The man answered.

"Huh?" Aqua turned her body to face him fully, a small, hopeful smile beginning to appear. "Wait a sec, is his name Terra or Ven?"

The man thought and was silent for a minute or so, then slowly shook his head. "Neither of those I'm afraid."

Aqua's smile disappeared quickly as she let out a weary sigh and looked down. "Should have known…" She turned back to the ocean and returned to staring out at the dark ocean.

"How long has it been since I met him… at least a year now, perhaps more_." Memories revealing themselves. _"Back then my heart was clouded with vengeance." The man raised his own hand and looked down upon it. _More memories_. "I did terrible things both to him and his friends." _A few more memories_. "I brought unhappiness to more lives than one." _Faces remembered._ "I felt something must be done. Was that why… a means of clearing my conscious or perhaps out of a scholarly instinct?" _Holes being filled_. "While the boy slept I hid the results of my research inside him, transporting the data to where it might best serve a purpose." _Thoughts and memories reconnecting. _"In fact I would like to believe maybe he can set things right. A boy like him who touches so many hearts, he could open the right door and save all those people whose lives I've managed to ruin. So many are still waiting for their new beginning, their birth by sleep, even me and even you." _Fragmented mind correcting itself._

Aqua turned to look at him once more, her head tilted in curiosity. "What's this boy's name?"

After a few moments of silence the man spoke. "His name is…" _Memory is almost…_

"Sora." _Complete._

Aqua stared at him and suddenly smiled. Her breathing became slightly erratic as she began to cry.

"Sora." She repeated the name as she moved back to facing the ocean. For a long time they sat in silence, lost in their own memories. "Excuse me, sir, but what is your name? You never said."

"My name…" The man began as he once more spared a glance toward his new companion. He had had many names and titles to choose from, but even still his answer came naturally.

"My name is Ansem."

And that was true.

He was no long Ansem the Wise for if he truly had been wise; he would have been to stop his beloved apprentices from traveling down that dark path into a terrible fate. If he was truly wise then his world that was once a paradise would not need to be completely rebuilt.

On the other hand he was no longer Darkness in Zero, or DiZ as he had taken to calling himself sometime back. The light of hope had been reignited. The darkness was no longer his friend or his only companion now. He could no longer use the darkness and it could no longer use him.

He was Ansem.

"Ansem…" Aqua said thoughtfully before looking at him. "I'm going to stay here, do you mind the company?"

Ansem let out a quiet, almost inaudible chuckle. "Of course not, I enjoy having visitors." And that was true. A long time ago Ansem recalled having a tiny mouse king as his visitor once and couldn't help but smile at that particular memory. It had been a very long time since his last smile.

"You seem like you've remembered a few things." Aqua said after a brief moment of comfortable silence.

"Indeed I have. The darkness that had clouded my mind and memories seems to have been lifted by that light of yours." Ansem replied with the tiny smile that had remained after his remembrance of the strange, yet kind king.

"I see… would you mind sharing a few? Memories are supposed to become clearer when spoke of. I don't mind if you don't want to." Aqua asked and turned her whole body to face him, no longer positioned to look out upon the dark ocean.

"Hmm. I suppose I have pieced together enough of my mind to tell a story or two." Ansem said as, he too, repositioned himself to face the young girl in front of him.

_Prologue: Of Blessed Memory_


	2. Amor Patriae Nostra Lex

_(AN: SO GUYS. This is a special chapter that was editted by a very good friend of mine. Who happens to be a grammer nazi. Naturally, the editting as not only improved this chapter by a lot, but also... shown me a few better ways to write. I hope that you can see my fanfiction quality go up because of my friend's assistance.)_

_Amor Patriae Nostra Lex_

"Thank you for taking the time to fill this out, sir. But, it was unnecessary…" the man said uncomfortably, as if he were uncertain and new to his job. He tugged on the collar of his business suit and took the form.

"Nonsense," Ansem said. "I do want to take the child under my care; however, one in my position will understandably have trouble giving him the attention he deserves. Fortunately, my other apprentices have agreed to assist me.

"Yes, I see what you mean." The man said a bit awkwardly. "But you see, sir, another party has, in fact, offered to take custody of this boy."

"Party? You speak of this as if he is to be adopted into the government, not a loving home." Ansem said. There were a few seconds of silence before he added, "The boy's name is Ienzo, correct?"

"Ienzo, but…" The caseworker paused awkwardly before he spoke again. "It is the city of Midgar who offered."

"What?" Ansem slammed his fists down onto the desk in frustration, causing the man to wince.

"Exactly, sir. It seems that the boy's mother lived there before moving here."

"And the father?"

_"Born and raised here in Radiant Garden, sir."_

Radiant Garden and Midgar were on very heavy _what does that even mean_terms. They had been for many years, and both sides were now simply waiting for war to break out.

Although Ansem was a peaceful ruler, he would not allow his city or any of its allies to be bullied into setting up one of those horrid reactors. During one of his previous visits he had briefly studied the effects those reactors had on the surrounding land.

It was devastating. The land was barren and dead; it was turned an unnatural shade of blue around the reactors. With nothing to eat, the animals starved and left the area to search for more nutrition. Ansem had little doubt that the reactors had caused this strange change to the land as Midgar had to import its food from the smaller towns without reactors to feed it.

The city of Midgar was not a place for a child to grow up. It was certainly not a place that an orphan would want to find him or herself. There were a great number of orphanages and an alarming amount of them were unable to receive any more children. There were too many lost children.

During his visit to Midgar, Ansem had only been taken to the wealthy upper districts. However, he had visited the poor and downtrodden citizens alone. Ansem always made a point of seeing how the unlucky were treated and the state of their homes. He had been shocked and appalled at the state of Midgar's districts.

For a long time Ansem had wondered why so many people lived in a place of such poverty. Why did they not leave? The answer had come to him as he traveled back to his own home.

Money.

The problem was not that the civilians did not wish to leave; it was that they did not have the resources to do so. And the wealthy citizens were often content with their easy lives and would rather go on holiday than make a permanent transition.

"What were the names of young Ienzo's parents? Their names where oddly absent from the files." Ansem asked, sitting back down. Getting worked up would not help the situation at all.

The caseworker shuffled some papers and checked the names on one of them. "His mother was Alcmene Cyra," he said, "and his father was Leto Illusio. Did you know them?"

"Ah, yes, Leto. He was a colleague of mine in school. I was not aware that he had a child, I will be sure to raise Ienzo as someone Leto would be proud of. Tell me; what is to become of young Ienzo?" Ansem asked, folding both of his arms over the desk.

"Well, sir…" the man said uncomfortably. "As you already know, the Council of Midgar is very, err, meticulous about its denizens. The Council decreed that Ienzo's mother did not have enough munny to exit the city."

Ansem scowled at that. "'Council of Midgar,' is that what they have taken to calling themselves? 'Meticulous' is not the word I would use to describe them; perhaps 'avaricious' or 'monopolizing.' Now, tell me what Ienzo's fate will be."

"Well, sir, we have already been offered a decent sum of munny for the return of the child," the caseworker said meekly.

"That is unacceptable. I will not allow him to be purchased like a common animal," Ansem said coldly. It was then that he noticed a small child peeking in at them from the doorway.

The child's face a completely blank slate and his eyes were emotionless. He had one hand on the door and the other was placed against the doorframe.

Ansem shook his own head and his forced his face to soften. He did not want to scare the boy and seeing the lack of emotion in the child created a small feeling of pity that lessened his anger.

Confused, the caretaker glanced behind him to see what had so drastically altered Ansem's expression. He noticed Ienzo and raised his eyebrows.

"Ienzo, what are you doing here? I thought I'd instructed you to stay at the orphanage." The caseworker spoke the last four words with a vengeance, as if attempting to nail the phrase into the child's head.

"There is no need to lecture him. This is actually convenient; I was going to call him in a few moments," Ansem said, glancing at the caretaker. "Come in, child."

Ienzo looked hesitant and gripped the frame of the door slightly. Ansem gave him a small smile. At this, Ienzo walked slowly into the room, his head down. He still did not say anything.

"You should thank Master Ansem for allowing you entrance, Ienzo. It isn't polite," The caseworker chided him. Ienzo did not reply to this, either.

"It is fine. If he does not wish to speak then I will not force him to." Ansem stood up and pulled out three sea salt ice creams from the mini refrigerator on the cabinet behind his desk.

"Ah," the caseworker started as he saw the sea salt ice cream. "I don't want any, but thank you for your offer."

"Very well." Ansem replaced the third ice cream and offered the second to the child. "Would you like some ice cream, Ienzo? It's sea salt, a personal favorite of mine."

Ienzo considered for several seconds before reaching out and taking the ice cream.

Ansem continued to watch Ienzo, paying little attention to the caseworker, as the two of them ate the frozen blue treats. After looking over the child for another minute or so, Ansem reached the conclusion that the boy resembled his father. Or at least what Ansem remembered of Leto. The eyes, however, must belong to his late mother.

"Now, Ienzo, do you wish to stay in Radiant Garden?" Ansem asked. Ienzo looked up at him, as if confused by the question. Ansem glanced at the caseworker with a frown. "You have not told him of his… circumstances?"

"You currently have two choices, Ienzo. You can remain here and be adopted by me, or be relocated to another city, where you will wait for adoption in a different orphanage. I believe this decision should be yours to make." The caseworker explained.

Ienzo looked down and closed his eyes, the frown disappearing as he thought. He opened his eyes and looked at Ansem, then around the room and at his caseworker. Finally, he looked back at Ansem. Both men were watching the child to see what he would do.

Ienzo took a step toward Ansem. His decision was resoundingly clear.

_Love of the Fatherland is our Law_


	3. Laborare Pugnare Parati Sumus

(_A.N. Now, all my wonderful readers, I have run into some problems with this chapter. I read online that Braig became an apprentice sometime after Xehanort was found. I'm not sure about that but I want this to be as cannon as I can make it. I can see how it might be true. But again, I'm really not sure. Until I get official information, however, the apprentices joined Ansem in the order of their rank in the Organization within my fanfiction. [With the exception of Xehanort of course]_)

_Laborare Pugnare Parati Sumus_

Ansem sensed the man behind him with in his office before anything. He turned around to see the largest man that he had ever seen. He must have been around six feet tall! His face was completely stoic and his arms were flat at his sides. He was very muscular. He was also holding an unconscious Braig and Dilan over both of his shoulders.

"Oh my, what on earth happened to the two of them! ?" Ansem walked over quickly to examine the two who were supposed to be guarding the castle but were now unconscious. Ansem found that they were fine other than a dislocated shoulder on Braig and a broken wrist on Dilan. There were also a lot of large bruises on the two of them. Ansem looked at the unknown man to find that he two was covered in cuts and bruises.

"Is that not what I had to do sir?" The giant man replied, as if confused about the problem. Ansem just gave him a confused look and frown.

"I was told that to qualify for the job, I would have to beat your two guards in a sparring session." The man explained and glanced at the unconscious Braig.

"By whom?" Ansem said while covering his face with one hand and massaging his temples. He had a feeling that he already knew who would do such a thing.

"The older one with the gun." The man stated bluntly as he looked at Braig.

Ansem just sighed. "I figured as much …I will have Even attend to the injuries." He glanced back at the large man.

"Come then, we will bring them to Even so he may see to all their injuries." Ansem said in a friendly manner and started walking. The man joined him and the two of them traversed the many corridors in a comfortable silence, or as comfortable as a silence could be in this situation.

After a few minutes Ansem broke the silence.

"You have most certainly proved your strength, but now you need to tell me your reason behind becoming a guardian of this castle?"

The man was silent and stopped walking as if he were contemplating something important. Ansem stopped walking and turned to look at the man.

"Perhaps your reason is to become even stronger?" Ansem guessed and crossed his hands in front of himself for a second.

The man shook his head slightly and seemed to reach a conclusion.

"To protect the leader of Radiant Garden." He stated modestly, speaking once more in a fragmented sentence.

Ansem smiled at that. He detected no lie from this man.

"That is a wonderful reason. I believe we will get along just fine ." Ansem let out a small chuckle as he realized something. "Now, I don't believe I have your name. What is it?"

"Aeleus."

Ansem nodded and approached his newest apprentice. He extended his hand to him and the both of them shook hands. Ansem noted that Aeleus had a very firm handshake and wasn't surprised in the least.

The two of them resumed walking and few more minutes of silence passed until Braig and Dilan regained consciousness.

"Braig, you are an _idiot._" The man named Dilan hissed after he remembered what had happened.

"Hey! How was I supposed to know that he was some kind of invincible wall of muscle! ?" Braig retorted as he rubbed his shoulder lightly, wincing in pain from the action. "Dislocated again? Bummer…" Braig groaned.

"We were supposed to inform Master Ansem you twit. Not challenge him and lose!" Dilan shot back, glaring daggers at his companion.

"Dilan is correct Braig." Ansem stated as he walked over to his two apprentices. "However, I cannot believe you went along with it Dilan."

Both apprentices winced at the sound of the disappointment in their master's voice.

"Hey, hey, I—I mean we- had to see if he was worth your time Master…" Braig attempted to reason, wincing and gritting his teeth every time Aeleus took a step.

Ansem frowned at him. "That is for me to decide Braig, remember that."

"Yeah, yeah…" Braig grumbled.

"As enjoyable as this form of transportation is, I prefer walking." Dilan stated in a very annoyed tone as he held his wrist.

"Yeah, have to agree there." Braig admitted.

Aeleus put the two of them down gently and Braig looked down at his shoulder, still in pain.

"As you said, your shoulder is dislocated and you may also have a concussion. And as Even has the most experience in relocating your shoulder, we are bringing the two of you to him." Ansem stated.

"Ack? ! Him?" Braig shouted louder than normal.

"At least I am not afraid of Even." Dilan snorted and looked rather smug.

"As if! I'm not afraid of _Even_! He just hates me!_" _Braig proclaimed and scowled at Dilan.

"That is because you're an idiot Braig and I much prefer the term _loathe_." Even said coldly as he exited his lab room, frowning at the man in question. Even let out an annoyed sigh as he saw the injuries of Aeleus, Braig, and Dilan and covered his face with one hand. "What happened this time? Am I to assume it was Braig's fault… again?" Even said slowly, enunciating each word in an exasperated tone.

"It appears that Braig and Dilan have decided to personally test the strength of everyone who wishes to take a job as a castle guard. So yes, it was Braig's fault… again." Ansem explained.

Even looked at Aeleus and looked slightly alarmed that he had taken out both Dilan and Braig. "I see…" Even shook his head ever so slightly and Ansem could tell he was torn between annoyance at having to patch Braig up again and being almost sadistically pleased at the most disrespectful apprentice's shattered pride.

"Well, come in you three and I will heal your injuries." Even muttered and walked into a room that was right next to his private laboratory.

The remaining four entered in after the blonde haired man.

The room was quite large and held quite a few cots lined up along the front and back of the room. Each cot had a built in curtain that would give the patient privacy if they desired it. The room was as white as any hospital room which means there was no color at all other than gray. On the left side from where they had entered was a cabinet with many drawers and beside that was another door.

Ansem noticed that Aeleus looked confused at the number of cots and elaborated. "If the hospitals were to experience an overflow in patients we are equipped to take in a few to smooth the flow." He explained.

"I see." Aeleus said and gave a curt nod.

"Hey, ya kook, don't go forgetting about me next time." Braig warned as he sauntered over to a cot to get his arm relocated.

Even stiffened at that and gave Braig a chilling glare after presenting Dilan with an ice pack to bring down the swelling of his wrist while he waited to get treatment.

Aeleus frowned slightly at Braig's words as Dilan walked over.

"Even has an annoying habit of getting too engrossed in his work and losing track of time." Dilan explained, ignoring Braig's shout of pain as Even popped his shoulder back in.

"Well Aeleus, Even will take good care of you. I have work that I need to return to. After Even finishes healing you, please come and see me in my office again." Ansem said and left the room.

_To Work, To Fight; We Are Ready_


	4. Hic Sunt Leones

_(A.N. I just have a quick little note that you probably already know. This fanfiction illustrates the Latin phrase __'__omnia dicta fortiora si dicta Latina'__ or in English: '__everything said [is] stronger if said in Latin' or 'everything sounds more impressive when said in Latin'. Also, I'm extremely sorry that this chapter is so short. My muse is acting up for some reason.)_

_Hic Sunt Leones_

Ansem was taking a pleasant stroll through Radiant Garden. Such an activity would usually calm his nerves and relax him. So would the sights of all the smiling people and the sounds of happy chatter mixed in with the gentle dribble of the large Fountain Court. The various scents of the bakery in the market place would also do him good, usually.

However, this was not a usual day at all. All the things that would normally relax him where not doing him a thing due to the current political problems that had been weighing heavily on Ansem's mind for quite a while now.

Due to the refusal to return young Ienzo, political tensions had greatly escalated. Ansem suspected that the city did not in fact care for the child, but merely wanted a reason to go to war, so confidant in their abilities to win, and therefore gain something from the war.

It would indeed take much more than a simple stroll to relax him.

Ansem recalled the meeting he had held with his apprentices a few days earlier. Both Dilan and Braig had suggested allowing Midgar to take the child and that it wasn't worth getting into this kind of trouble with another large and quite powerful nation. Unsurprisingly Aeleus had strongly disagreed along with Even. Ansem vaguely remembered that Even had gotten into a strong …disagreement with another scientist from Midgar.

Ansem's final decision was to raise the child. Not that he would not have if all of his apprentices had suggested what Braig and Dilan both had, he simply valued their opinion and had wanted to hear what they thought was the correct course of action. Ansem was going to raise the child, for Leto's sake.

Ansem was pulled out of his thoughts as a teenager, at the bright age of fourteen, walked over to him and looked at him expectantly.

"Why hello." Ansem said and looked down at the youth with a smile. The teenager nodded back and proceeded to say.

"I want to become a castle guard."

Ansem suppressed a chuckle at the sudden bluntness of it all. He was used to young boys asking that by now. The child looked completely serious and to laugh would not do the boy's self-esteem well.

"I see, but why would you want to do that?" Ansem asked as he leaned down to the teenager's height. The boy looked right back with steel gray eyes.

"I want to get stronger." He said without hesitation.

"Why?" Ansem asked again, curious now of the teenager's motives. He had heard other child say the same thing, but why they wanted to be stronger was always interesting.

"Because if I get stronger then… I can find her." The teen replied and crossed his arms.

"Find who?" Ansem asked and stood up again.

"Find my older sister." The teenager answered truthfully.

"You're older sister? Is she missing?" Ansem asked with a frown.

The teenager nodded and said again.

"I want to become a castle guard."

"I'm sorry to say that you are a bit young for that. Perhaps you could tell me of your younger sister's name?" Ansem inquired.

"Ellone Loire." The teen responded.

"And what is yours young man?" Ansem asked again.

"Squall …Leonhart." The fourteen year old answered.

"Leonhart… Hmm, how long has your sister been missing? Surely your parents have contacted the authorities." Ansem reasoned and walked over to a nearby bench to sit on.

"We don't have any parents." Squall said stiffly as he followed Ansem over. He did not sit down.

"Ah, my apologies then if I stirred up negative memories." Ansem said, meaning every word of it.

"Whatever. Big Sis has been missing for a year. Nobody at the orphanage seems to care." Squall said while glaring at the ground.

Ansem frowned very deeply at that. Yes, children went missing, it was something that could not be stopped. Yet, for an orphanage to not care for a missing child… that was unacceptable.

"What is the name of your orphanage Leon?" Ansem asked briskly. He was going to see that this orphanage be examined by child services.

"Balamb Garden Orphanage." Leon answered.

_Here There Are Lions_


End file.
